Top 5 Strangest/Most Unnecessary Baby Products

Do you ever look at some products out there and have a serious “Oh my God, who would actually buy this?” moment? I do all the time, but I am pretty big on only buying things that I deem actually necessary.

So after perusing the internet tonight (baby L is asleep and my fiance is setting up a PS3 so I actually had some time to play on the net) I found some products that I just had to comment on. Some made me laugh, some made me slap my hand to my forehead in disbelief.

Would love to hear your opinions!

So here we go – My top 5 strangest, most unnecessary baby products of all time!

1) Baby Bangs (www.babybangs.com)

baby-bangs

Seriously – WTF.

I mean my little girl was bald for her first 9 months, but it’s a cute baby bald. I never felt the need to Donald Trump her and give her an obviously fake toupee! Who actually looks at her baby and says “I mean she’s kinda cute, but I mean I think she’d be prettier if I could give her a wig”. Way to start your daughter off with a complex right from the get go – you’ve only just been born, and we’re already giving you body image issues. Yay! (BARF!)

2) Temperature Test Duck

temperature duck

While pregnant, I was walking through Babies R Us with someone who spotted this and exclaimed “Wow! What a genius idea! Now you’ll know if the water is too hot!”.

Umm, correct me if I’m wrong, but in the time it takes you to take the duck and put it in the water, wait for the duck to read the temperature, pick it up and turn it over to read the temperature gauge….. could you not have just put your damn hand into the tub and checked it yourself?! Completely unnecessary.

3) Baby Bottom Fan

baby bottom fan

Baby bum rashes suck. I’ve been there and done that and it is a PAIN IN THE ASS (Haha look at me being punny) to deal with. Any doctor or nurse will tell you that letting your babe air out their tush is crucial to speeding up healing time. But seriously? A baby bottom fan? When my kid is sore and in pain, and doesn’t sit still, I’m not about to put a fan with whirring blades up in there. It’s not like she’d sit still to let me do it anyway. Besides there’s this other thing you can use that will do the same thing for free…. air.

4) Perfume for babies.

Baby Perfume

ARE. YOU. FOR. REAL?

Seriously. It was recently in the news that Dolce and Gabbana is also releasing a baby perfume, for all those mama’s who are like “Eww I hate the way my baby smells”. Excuse me?
The thing I love most about babies is that baby smell! Their little freshly bathed heads. Besides, who in their right mind is ok with slathering unnecessary chemicals all over their babes skin?

This is just an awful idea all around.

5) Buster ride on vaccuum for toddlers.

Buster Ride on Vaccuum

Ok when I first saw this, I thought this was so unnecessary and just a marketing ploy. Then I really thought about it. Whoever invented this is actually a GENIUS!

This is probably the only thing on this list I might buy. My kid is obsessed with her little ride on cars. She tries to go all over the house with them. She’s also obsessed with the vaccuum cleaner. Why not combine them, let her “play” and then it’s one less chore for Mommy to do?

“Hey Mama, can I PLEEASE ride my car in the house?”

“Sigh… if you must.”

Mom gets to sit back with a Hershey bar while the kid cleans the house without even knowing it.

Where can I get one of these?

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22 thoughts on “Top 5 Strangest/Most Unnecessary Baby Products

  1. The only one I actually do think is neat other then the vacuume is the rubber ducky temp, it did come in a handy a bit when my body temp was off and to hard to check if it was too warm. But I saw something that made me say wtf recently,here’s the link; (just remember ladies u can’t bring sexy back in the delivery room no matter what lol) http://www.dressedtodeliver.com/

    • HAH!
      Ohhh they are definitely catering to the lady who hasn’t actually been through childbirth yet. Anyone who has been there and done that knows, you don’t give a s**t what you look like while you’re pushing out a kid.
      That’s so great!

  2. I completely agree with your top 5 (and also kind of like the vacuum, although my son was afraid of the vacuum so I don’t know how that would work) As for the Delivery dresses… I might be wrong, but it seems a little absurd to go pay $70 (plus taxes/shipping etc) for a gown that you are either A) going to find it uncomfortable and take off anyways (I delivered in a bra, or nothing because I was so effing hot) or B) end up unable to ever wear it ever again (or even sell it for that matter) because of the likelihood of getting any of the various fluids on it when your water breaks or you are actually delivering the baby…The only thing I would add to your list (not to much a strange item, but I found it totally useless) is baby towels. Maybe I just got icky ones, but they don’t absorb at all, they are small and hard to wrap baby in, and I liked using my big soft ones much better! I just had a conversation about useless baby stuff today with a friend who is expecting and towels were the first on my list!

  3. haha I loved this list although have to disagree about the duck temp thingys. We loved ours and surprisingly we did need it. I used to test with my hand first and see what I thought and then check the duck. I was way off so often that my son should be stoked I invested in the plastic thermometre for bath time! I will def use for next bubby too. I don’t use it now and tested with my hand last night and thought it was ok…I was sooooo wrong. My toddler got in and looked at me like I was mean and said “hot mummy”. Felt AWFUL.

  4. LOL, people have way too much time on their hands to sit around thinking of yet MORE crazy baby products. That perfume idea just makes me mad – babies shouldn’t have anything scented put on their sensitive, PERFECT, skin! 😦

  5. My little man sits on our roomba and rides it around the house, so naturally I think the vacuum is ingenious. The perfume is bizarre I know fruits and passion makes one as well.

  6. HmmmI don’t know. I didn’t find them all on one page. I just googled weird baby products, went to a bunch of websites (probably 8-10) and made a list of what I thought was weirdest. I don’t generally look at buzzfeed on the regular so wasn’t aware it was done before.

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