“Are you serious? Breast milk flavored lollipops? It was hard enough to wean my kid…”

I will start this off by saying, yes I breastfed my kid. I fully support it. But I weaned her for a reason…

Have you heard of these things yet? OMG, the thoughts running through my head right now. I don’t even know where to start. I’ll give it a go anyhow. I guess I’ll start with the link to the article.

http://newsfeed.time.com/2013/06/06/breast-milk-flavored-lollipops-are-real/

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That’s right folks. They are real. Holy crap.
Here goes:

1) It isn’t even real breast milk, but they had to emulate the flavor somehow. Enter the flavor specialists! It’s their job to get the flavor right. “With the help of some breastfeeding mothers, who β€œkept sharing their breast milk with our flavor specialists until we were able to candify it,”. – Guess I’m working the wrong job. Who wouldn’t want to have to taste hundreds of breast milk samples from God knows who, over and over all day long. BARF!!!

2) Seriously people. Have you ever tried to wean a kid from breastfeeding? The last thing I want to do is give her a candy that tastes like the stuff. Next thing you know, I’ll be out of lollipops, and I’ll have a screaming kid grabbing for my tits again in the grocery store. Thanks, but no thanks!

3) Newest flavor addition to Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans – Your mother’s boob milk! (Only the geeks will get it, but I’m fine with that).

4) So you’ve got these in your purse for your kid, but then your husband/fiance/brother/sister/stranger goes searching through your purse for a snack (come on Mom‘s, they all know we keep a secret stash in our bag in case our kid throws a fit somewhere and we have to bribe with food). “Mmm what kind of sucker is this? It seems familiar, but I can’t place it….”. Oh you know, that taste of childhood – your mother’s boob. BARF!

5) What are they going to name these things? Nipple nummies? Aereola delights? Mama’s Mammary Munchies? I might be throwing up a little in my mouth.

As gross as I find this, I’m secretly a little jealous I didn’t think of this idea myself. You know these people are raking in the money right now from the crunchy granola mama’s who think this is fabulous.

Where’s my nasty million dollar idea?

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9 thoughts on ““Are you serious? Breast milk flavored lollipops? It was hard enough to wean my kid…”

  1. ROFL!! I agree with your BARF sentiment exactly! Btw, I am still breastfeeding my 21 month old and I have no idea how I am ever to wean him, he is still so enthusiastic! *sigh*

    • See that’s the thing, I’m so pro-breastfeeding! It’s so great for both mama and baby.
      But this – this made me want to vomit oh so much.
      From the flavor testing, to the whole idea of it… so so nasty!
      Thanks for the feedback! I’m super new to this and it’s great to hear some feedback and get my blog out there for the world to see! πŸ™‚

  2. Oh my gosh this is hilarious. A breast milk flavored lollipop is THE NASTIEST thing I have ever heard of (well, besides the eating the placenta for the nutrients phenomenon). I nursed all of my kids too but this is kind of up there on the weird level, along with the moms who keep nursing until their kids are 10. I think it would be kind of fun to get them just to give out to the family members you are irritated with. What a fantastic “accidental” prank! (sidenote: I’m a Harry Potter nerd so I love #3) πŸ™‚

  3. Loved the Bertie Botts every flavour beans :). (I live in a house full of potter fans, my 4 year old is obsessed and has watched every movie several times). Back to the Boob lolly, that is just yucky especially that it isn’t even real. So what’s the point? I wouldn’t give my child someone else’s boob milk anyway but why give them fake stuff when I’m sure he would just as much enjoy a more conventional flavour. I’ve heard of breast milk ice cream which makes a little bit more sense because its actually breast milk. What’s funny though, when you really think about it, humans drinking human milk makes more sense than humans drinking cow milk. (I’m not about to be the one who starts that trend though.)

  4. Oh my goodness, this is wrong on so many levels! I can’t even begin to see how this is a good idea. Emulated breastmilk flavour? Tasting who know how many samples of actual breastmilk? Urgh. The good thing is that it might actually have its place in the Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans LOL.

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